Love at First Byte

It may not sound the most romantic of beginnings, but more and more couples are meeting and mating via the Net. And, though you can pretend to look like Hugh Grant or Britney Spears – even if nothing could be further from the truth – research proves that people far more honest on-line. One of the main reasons is visual anonymity. Give them a video link – so they can see the other person they are chatting to – and the honesty factor drops considerable. People give out four times as much information if they can’t see the person they are talking to. The main point is that we all live in a society where the first impressions are everything. If you don’t like what you see you won’t even try to get to know someone better. The great thing about meeting people on the Net is that there’s no such thing as “I-am-looking-awfully-today”. True, it may not be romantic, but how many people really meet on the Orient Express on the way to Venice like they do in the movies? It is usually in a noisy bar where he’s trying to hold his stomach in and she’s so nervous about the impression she’s making that the body language, rather than the conversation, becomes the important thing. The reason why chat sites are a good way of meeting people – and an increasingly popular one – is that you have time to think about what you’re going to say. Who hasn’t been out on a first date and nervously blurted something out they’ve regretted? If you have to type it out, you give a more considered answer and therefore a more honest one, which is a better basis for starting a relationship. First you can click into a chat-room and flirt on-line with several others. Just like you might in a bar, yet you’re relaxed in your own home – and nobody can see that spot on your nose. Then you move on to talking to just one selected mate via e-mail. You have time to consider your reply so there’s less scope for misunderstanding. Then it’s talking by telephone and that first date, by which time you’ll know each other pretty well. People like each other more if they are not influenced by looks. It’s feelings that are important and the internet inflates them.